Some childhood memories are weird.
They're not necessarily bad, they just make you ponder a little bit. One that came back to me recently was the time I received a letter from Sonic the Hedgehog. I know, it sounds exciting, doesn't it? The idea that everyone's favourite blue blur was once my pen pal makes me seem like a very important person, and I'm vaguely tempted to put it on my résumé.
No, it wasn't a short-lived promotional scheme from SEGA or anything like that. If that had been the case, it probably would have cost me $30 per sentence, and consisted of little more than words that rhyme with Corey.
It all started with a letter my sister had received. She claimed that it was from Melody, of My Little Pony Tales, and I was absolutely gobsmacked. I can't remember how old I was at the time, and near as I recall, I don't even think it said 'from Melody' anywhere on the letter. To be quite honest with you, the fact that I believed her is probably an indictment of my intelligence. I mean, it's not like I ever thought that Melody was a real living being or anything, but why did I have any reason to question it?
If my sister says that a fictional pony wrote her a letter, then fuck, I guess that's what was happening in the world now. What a time to be alive!
She claimed that if you sent a letter to some place called Cartoon Land or some such, they would write a reply. A quick Google Maps search confirms that there is a Cartoon Land in Romania, and one in France that breeds Maine Coons. As the latter doesn't sound particularly relevant, I'll assume that this wonderful magical place of correspondence was the Romanian one.
My tiny little brain raced with the possibilities. I was an opinionated child, and always keen to speak my mind. Maybe one of my heroes would listen to me?
There was not a single doubt as to who I would send a letter to, however. I was going to get in touch with my buddy, Sonic the Hedgehog. Anyone who has frequented this blog would know my colourful history as a Sonic fanboy, and indeed, the insane lengths I will go to just to validate that fandom. So really, it shouldn't come as too much of a surprise that he was the first name that popped up.
Whatever I wrote to Sonic, I can't recall for the life of me. I wasn't really penning a lot of letters at the time, and my propensity to ramble aimlessly was apparent even back then. I don't think I asked him any questions about his life or anything, because I was a selfish fuck, and he would probably find my story much more interesting.
I passed the letter onto my sister, and away it went! Off to Cartoon Land, possibly in Romania.
And so, the waiting game began. What if he didn't read it? What if he thought I was dumb, and showed it to all his friends? What if it got intercepted by Dr. Robotnik en route, and he used it as the final piece to his most nefarious plan? I don't know how a child's poorly written letter could be used for evil, but I'm sure he could come up with something.
Then, the day came.
Addressed to Anthony Cocking, of 2770 Tatton Road. A letter from Sonic the Hedgehog. It even had these awesome little drawings of Sonic and Tails on the envelope, so you knew it was legit. I eagerly tore it open, and read through the note with great intrigue. It was mostly filled with praise, as well as advice that I should always listen to my sister, because she was very smart.
Alright, so we all know that she wrote the letter (or at least I assume that was the case. What a fucking twist it would be if it was legit), but it didn't dawn on me at the time. She said that if I wrote to Sonic, he would write back, and there it was, in my hands. I don't know if I had ever mentioned having a sister in my missive, so that was a bit of a risky gambit there, but as we've already established, I wasn't really that bright.
The point is, it was a sweet gesture from my sister that brought a little bit of whimsy into a young boy's life. Or she was playing mind games, who knows for sure. It's just a shame that being so tight with Sonic didn't help me get that Collector's Edition any cheaper.
So I posit the question to you, the
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